Day 59 - Part 1 - Sick and Tired.

I'm SO sick and tired of too many things. Not getting the sleep I need, for one. it is partially my own fault, yes, but my dad does NOT have to wake me at 11 in the holidays. Or the weekend, for that matter. Today was a one in a million, sleeping in until 1 in the atfernoon. But that was only because my sister woke me for breakfast. I could've slept forever.
And then, thingd kinda got worse during the day. I had breakfast, my mom kept me downstairs by telling me all sorts of stuff I'm NOT interested in (a habit of hers I get very annoyed by), I took a shower. Then I was supposed to call Dennis, but I was nervous like crazy, so I teskted him that, and decided to call him anyways. But he didn't pick up. And we so much agreed I would call. Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck. I miss him too much, I think.
My sister wanted me to take her to the science centre close to our house, which I am bored like hell by, but i the end she couldn't find her pass to get in frewe and we didn't go. There went an hour of searching for nothing, yay.
So, up I went, back to my computer and re-emptied desk. Read a little. Went chatting with some people on gsm and ppg. No Dennis online. And then the internet decided to hate me and went out for the rest of the day, which, by the way, was only two hours to dinner by then, dinner that I had to cook. It was my turn today.
And I finished my book, the True Blood series first one, I love it, but I got the creeps and now I'm kinda afraid of the dark all over again. Still no Dennis.
And then I cooked dinner, had dinner, dad's late once again, my sister doesn't want to eat, my brother preferably never came down. We did have a good time, though.
Now I just had to put my sister to bed, but she wants me to watch home Alone 2 with her, which my mom allowed her to watch, so I'm stuck in my parents room with my sister and a movie I don't really want to see. Internet's back on, but that doesn't really matter. I'll take True Blood 2 with me.
And all this time, no Dennis.

Day 58 - Part 1 - Starting fresh.

Yep, my room is all cleaned up. Finally. But not without a series of yelling mom, some serious talks, more yelling, waking up at nine and working like crazy so my mom won't throw everything out. Yuck.
I can clean, really, I can. I'm just not that good at getting myself to actually work on it. Too freaking bad. You don't have to make me cry for that, mom. Great start of a three week aniversary -.-'
THREE WEEKS! I'm so happily hyper right now. It's over half of a month. Oh my WOW. I love him. Dennis, I love you. Forever ;)
Anita's coming over soon to go shopping, correction, she just came in, so I'll be off. Bye guys ^^

Day 57 - Part 1 - Mixed Feelings.

My life's pretty much perfect right now: I've got an amazing boyfriend, sweet friends, I get good grades in school, I have a lot of people liking me, I'm talented in quite some things, I found a solution for my ADHD and for losing weight, but it just... Doesn't feel good.
I feel like I'm waiting for something. Like I need something to take a first step. Like my life is empty. But I know it isn't. It's not reallt saddening, really not, I'm still very happy, it's just very weid. My life is perfect, but it's like the stories I write: it's going nowhere.

Day 56 - Part 3 - I won't let you make me regret.

I won't let you make me reget
The mistakes I made
The things I did wrong
Because I learned from them.

I won't let you make me forget
The good memories
Or the bad times
Because I know them.

I won't let you make me try
To feel bad, broken
Lost in pain
Because I've been there before.

I won't let you lift me up
To drop me down
Or leave me floating

Because no matter how hard I try
I will never see the sky

Unbroken


*this just popped into my head*

Day 56 - Part 2 - Never even mind it.

Yeah, sure mom. It's fun, screwing up my computer and then yelling at me like it's all my fault, isn't it? Isn't it just the ultimate fun screaming at me for an answer, then smacking the door of my room as you leave, me being left biting my lip until it almost bleeds just not to tear up in front of you? Oh, so much fun screwing my presents by tapping on it and doing something weird so my computer looks totally sucking and I can't repair it.
I love her then I hate her... Can't she ever be normal?
Tears are clouding my vision and wetting mt shirt, but who gives a damn?
I can tell you who doesn't for sure.

Day 56 - Part 1 - GOSH, I love this thing.

Oh yes, I do.
I disconnected my mouse now, I'm using my tablet only, and I LOVE it.
And I love my cd. It's A-MA-ZING. I guess I'm addicted ;)
So, this tablet came with this awesome trial tutorial programme thing, and I'm addicted to the games ;)
AND I want Dennis to come back online. I miss you. No matter how long we talk, how many hours, days, it never seems to be enough. Somehow, whenever one of us has to leave, it feels like we've only be talking for minutes. I hate it. Grmbl.
JIMMY, get online NOW. I need someone to brag to ^^

Day 55 - Part 1 - Luzzie Loves Christmas.

I LOVE CHRISTMAS.
From now on. Got amazing presents. For one, my parents got me a Bamboo tablet. I mean, one of those 200 euro things :O
I HAVE been nagging about it forever, but I never ever thought they'd actually get me one <3
Other presents: A My Chemical romance cd (LOVEITLOVEITLOVEIT), two store boxes, new slippers, a weird funny game and fabric paint plus figures. My brother got a new guitar, my sister a 3DS, my dad a new coffee machine, and my mom stacks and stacks of books. And some other things, but these were the best ones.
I'm gonna instal my new tablet RIGHT NOW, so merry Christmas to you all, and have fun today <3

Day 54 - Part 3 - Lets listen to these smart people.

OK, Dennis?

Day 54 - Part 2 - afghrkjgfd

Now that my nternet is being all happy again, my youtube is failing. Just when I get all these links, which contain my new favoutire songs :(

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YFEDTtKaFzU
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XHraqDekXg0&feature=related

Day 54 - Part 1 - Speechless.

Day 53 - Part 2 - Storm in my room.

I wish my dad would fix my window. It's cold in here, gaps by my window, wind blowing in. I've got all these scarfs and shawls gathered in my windowframe to keep out the worst, which kinda sucks, because my room isn't getting any prettier. And now I'm sitting here surrounded by cold air and wind and creepy noises and I've got my toed pressed against the heater and I'm pretending to be deaf and NOT cold... Which, to be honest, is actually working out pretty good.
But my dad's sending me off too bed, and my eyes are drooping, and even Dennis is telling me to go, and I DON'T want to.
Gonna go anyway, I think.

Good night everybody.

Day 53 - Part 1 - Making Wishes

http://www.esprit.com/
I did that some time ago, I wonder if anyone's able to find me ;)
Anyways, this morning was Christmas breakfast at school, which was nice, though all I ate was unhealthy (apart from this one mandarine which doesn't make up for anything AT ALL), and then when my class was wrapping things up, Anita dragged me along to her class, where I spend another hour of two doing weird games and having fun.
Then I drove home with Alice, and decided to go over to her place, cycling through some cold wetness that wasn't realy fog and wasn't really rain and wasn't really drizzle. It was weird.
I REALLY like her family. It's crazy and weird and random and her sister and brother are, like, WILD, and her father's funny and her mom kinda keeps everyone together, but she has fun too. It's a funcional family, with just about the same craziness level as me.
AND, it's cold enough outside to blow clouds of breath. Which I was worried about, since it wasn't for a long time and I'm usually freezing, no metter where I am.
Dinner now ^^

Day 51 - Part 2 - Regrets.

Never had them, never will.
Well, that's not true, but I'll never regret sending my letter to Dennis <3

Day 51 - Part 1 - Party Time

Lots and lots of them ^^
For one, today's Diana's birthday, she's 17 now, so congrats to her.
Second, I'm having my period. Which isn't that much iof a party at all, it hurts and it's VERY annoying, but after loosing so much weight, I'm very gald my body still works normally.
Third, I gained another half a kilo, so I'm happy about that.
And forth, SCHOOL'S OVER! I had my last day of lessons today, and I won't have anymore classes for the rest of 2011 (which, I know, lasts about two more weeks, but it's awesome anyway).
Also, we have to write an essay on "The Book Thief" by Markus Zusak (consider reading it, REALLY), and I let Barbara read my introduction, and she thought it was good, so I let my teacher read it too, and he thought it was so good that he make this other girl read it. And she tought is was good as well, so she read the other one and a half paragraph I've written, just to get an idea of what an essay should look like. And my former essays (in the last threee years) sucked big time, so I'm very proud of myself.
And lastly, I finished my letter to Dennis. I'm just about to leave to post it, and it's awesome. Oh, and Dennis, there's a little surprise. I bet it's not as expensive as those super cute chocolates (which I still think of as a waste to eat), but it's cool anyways ^^
So now I'm off to post the letter and get peanutbutter and nutella for tomorrow's Christmas breakfast at school.
Cooking tonight! :D

Day 50 - Part 2 - Screwed up fun.

I like celebrating Hannukah... Until my mom sends me off to put my little sister to bed and she doesn't want to so we start this fake fight and have a lot of fun until a door accidentally slams into her face and my mom comes up yelling at me all over while it wasn't my fault that we were being wild in the first place.
Anyways, I'd better be going off to bed now, before my parents start to kill me for real. I love you all ^^

Day 50 - Part 1 - Back online.

My internet has been failing for almost 3 days, but my dad fixed it now ^^
So, life's been kinda boring in here. I've got no homework because of the Christmas break coming up, my room needs a cleaning, which I'm working on, but it's not keeping my mind real busy, the internet was out, I've got no money, I'm out of books and I don't have inspiration to draw or design. In short, my life kinda sucks big time right now.
Also, Dennis isn't online, and i miss him like crazy, so I guess I'm going off to ppg now to nag and break people's heads about him ;)

Day 47 - Part 2 - I love my phone.

Well, actually I like the person on the other side of it. I seriousely got the sweetest message ever. Of course, i've seen it passing by in varying forms quite often, but never from my love, Gah, I love Dennis so much. I wish I could make time pass fast, and then let it stand still forever.
But well, those kind of big wishes don't really come true.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FAPtTS0TYtU&feature=fvst

Day 47 - Part 1 - Too tired.

Oh, fine, Dennis is right, my body DOES need sleep. I went to bed around 00.30, and I woke up at 12, but I'm just so tired. Too tired to do anything. With that, having to make a history file and learning German doesn't really keep me awake either. Better to say, I'm slumping my my chair and trying my best to keep my eyes open. But I think my friend's here, so I'll be off now. Enjoy this picture in the mean time ;)

Day 46 - Part 7 - Tell me all about it.